25 June 2012

Oh, hello monday.

Today, I am sick.
Yes, again.
Some sort of stomach bug or I ate something weird yesterday...
{probably too many mozzarella sticks}

So at some point this weekend, I realized that I don't fit into my summer clothes anymore.
Like, any of them.
I fit into some of my dresses still (the really loose flowy ones), but shorts?  Tank tops?
Nope.
My cups have started to spilleth overeth.
{that's shakespearian for spilling over the top of everything i own}

via Pintrest, original {here}

I know I've posted here about being happy with myself, and good self esteem and all of that but...
Really, these are size XL clothes for crying out loud.  Size 13 pants?  Really?
I was an 8 in high school and thought *that* was fat.
I tried on one of my old (like high school old) dresses the other day, that was a size 8/10, and it barely fit over one thigh. My thighs are as big around right now as my waist used to be.
There's something seriously wrong with that picture.
And it's all my own doing.  Really, twelve mozzarella sticks at like 7 at night?  AND four peanut butter cookies?  Big ones?  Yeah, no bueno.

I know what stuff I'm supposed to be eating, and the exercise I'm supposed to be getting, but there's this little roadblock I know I keep hitting.  For some reason I just can't stop with the overeating and eating crap food.  I know it makes me feel shittier in the end but...it just feels like I have excuse after excuse to keep being that way.  And I hate myself for it.

So I guess what I'm saying is...
This ends today.
I will not put another piece of junk food in my mouth, until we cut the cake at my wedding.
{with the tiny exception of the tasting, because how on earth will I be able to not?}
This is going to piss me off royally.
No more pop tarts. Potato chips. Candy bars. Popcorn chicken. Ice cream snickers bars.  Chicken fingers in general.  Deep fried stuff period. No pop {soda for non - New Yorkers}, even ginger ale.  No boozey drinks.

I can do this.
One day at a time.
...

{ps - did you enter my giveaway? you should!!}

So tell me, what's your favorite healthy snacky alternative to chips and dip?  Or cupcakes?



4 comments:

Courtney B said...

You can totally do it!!
Okay, since being pregnant I've really only been snacky these past couple weeks. I just didn't want to eat ANYTHING for the first 12-13 weeks, even though I wasn't sick. But obviously it was very important for me to put food in my mouth every 2-3 hours. To be honest, I didn't find any alternatives that I liked, I just did it because I knew I had to. So I liked easy snacks. Carrots, fruits that don't need any prepping, almonds (but I did eat those with m&m's because I hate almonds), wheat thins with peanut butter or cheese slices on them, yogurt, etc. Now that I'm craving all sorts of yummy, unhealthy snacks again I just don't buy them. Because I went with out them for 3 months, I can continue to do so :) But it's freakin' hard to just not give in! But WE can do it, right? :)
Good luck!

p.s. Chips and salsa isn't bad, right? Salsa is packed full of veggies ;)

Unknown said...

I was super inspired by this blog. for about 3 minutes. then I remembered we have Oreos and my iPhone is getting covered in crumbs as I type this comment. lol
but in all seriousness, be healthy about weight loss. I love veggies and dip, and types of snacks like that, but it's all about proportions. don't starve yourself of treats of you'll just end up binging. allow yourself a LITTLE treat often.
but in all seriousness, size doesn't matter as long as your happy. we probably could all afford to lose a few, but is life really fun when you're always glaring at your friend consume their iced Capp while you sip on tap water??
stay smiling. doesn't matter your size if your happy :) I think you're gorgeous!!!
see you soon I hope!! (and p.s. I can't wait for the "car jumping" entry lol)
-Carrie

Unknown said...

I was super inspired by this blog. for about 3 minutes. then I remembered we have Oreos and my iPhone is getting covered in crumbs as I type this comment. lol
but in all seriousness, be healthy about weight loss. I love veggies and dip, and types of snacks like that, but it's all about proportions. don't starve yourself of treats of you'll just end up binging. allow yourself a LITTLE treat often.
but in all seriousness, size doesn't matter as long as your happy. we probably could all afford to lose a few, but is life really fun when you're always glaring at your friend consume their iced Capp while you sip on tap water??
stay smiling. doesn't matter your size if your happy :) I think you're gorgeous!!!
see you soon I hope!! (and p.s. I can't wait for the "car jumping" entry lol)
-Carrie

Miss Traci said...

Thanks guys :)
I know that not eating a single piece of junk food is probably unlikely, but if I at least have that goal in mind, I'm more likely to stick to it, than if I say "oh, i can still eat this, it's only one..."because it inevitably leads to another and so on. Chips and salsa are definitely a go! As long as I'm eating the whole grain chips anyway. :)