A winner, some stuff, and some other stuff...

So it appears that there's going to be a lot going on in this post.

Firstly, today I shall announce the winner of my $25 shop credit!

The winner is

{drumroll please...}

Elyse from {Home Sweet Holmes}

Fyi, Elyse is totally amazeballs, and was my secret sender in the Send Something Good project.
No, that's not how she got chosen.
I used a number generator.
Hers was the comment that corresponded with the number.
<3

Secondly,
Thank you to everyone who left really lovely comments on my last post.
I posted because I was really feeling in a low place, and it really came from my heart to post about my weight and stuff (which i usually ignore), so it was really nice to have some really nice positive feedback on that.  Plus, my fiance left a comment and it made me smile bigger than the Cheshire cat :)

Thirdly,
I got our engagement pictures back last night!!
Our most excellent photographer Liz gave me the CD's on Friday afternoon, and oh my sweet sharon, they are to die for.  Seriously. Every. Single. Photo. is perfect.  It's really sweet, that in half of them I'm staring lovingly at my man.  Or kind of sappy, but I feel like I could never get sick of looking at him, so that's gotta be a grand thing...right?  Yeah. Thought so.

Dusk, on a walkway near the Peace Bridge. Love these lights.

Standing on top of a stone bridge thing at Delaware Park.

Again, Delaware Park.

Reality check.

Today, I stepped on the scale.

Because I realized it was stupid to try to "lose weight" without having a damn clue about how much I weighed to begin with.

It was officially the most I've weighed in my whole life.

190.4 lbs

Are you kidding me?

I mean really. My damn jeans I've had for four years fit me.  Don't they? I wear the same three pairs every day...

And ok, that pretty red dress from last summer is a *bit* snug in the chest, but it still zips...

And yeah, I had to buy a new pair of shorts and they're kind of tight but they're junior sizes, which always run small...right?

NO.

Eff. That.

I refuse to live in a little bubble anymore.

I know I'm not morbidly obese, and I truly like myself a lot (mostly).

But there's no way I can weigh 190 pounds and pretend like I'm supposed to.

So I guess what I'm saying is...

Shit just got real.

 Yupp, that's me.  Wearing probably the world's worst sports bra, but when you have huge jugs, you gotta take what you can get...it's hard to find any in my size.  Ugh.

So, in an effort to keep myself accountable and really track my progress, I'm gonna take one of those pictures every month.  So I can watch my whale shrink back into a koi fish.
{i kid, it's not that bad}
But so I can at least watch myself shrink back into a size medium pant, and a size large top.
In junior sizes.

Also, I really have to do a better job of eating protein.
I kind of hate meat, and get sick of chicken after awhile so I'm pretty sure I go weeks at a time without any damn protein.  This week I've been working on cutting out some of the junkier food I've been eating too regularly, and replacing it with better stuff like salads, oatmeal, and yogurt (even though yogurt still makes me gag), so next week I plan to try to incorporate more proteins into my days.  Beginning I guess with eggs, because I just bought some and the last ones went bad before we ate any (i kind of hate eggs too...unless there's a ton of cheese, and i'm trying to eat less cheese since it's not really good for you in huge quantities).

Today, I managed to get in what I think is a pretty good starter workout.  Like I've posted before, I've been trying to walk on a daily basis, or near to daily.  I'm not a super speed walker, so I know it's not much, but since it's better than wasting all of my time on the couch I figure I'll give it a go.  In addition to that, today I did:
60 jumping jacks doesn't sound like much, but geez it's hard)
35 pushups (but girly ones)
40 crunches (because a sit up all the way isn't happening yet)
like 50 step ups (like 50 because i think it was more but idk)
30 mountain climbers

plus some light weight arm lifts, to help tone my arms. (20 reps of two things, so 40 reps)

Like I said...starter workout.
Ah well, Rome wasn't built in a day.
It's gotta start somewhere.

Dear Friday:

Lobsters. It's a FRIENDS reference. Look it up <3

dear self: i'm pretty pissed at you right now. we can be friends again later, but right now, you suck. a lot.  dear fiance: i had fun last night.  i wish we were on more of a similar schedule so we could hang out like that all the time.  dear morning: everyone keeps trying to convince me that you don't suck, and that i'll be a morning person eventually.  i think they're lying. dear work: be over soon ok? i have an appointment for a nap on my couch... dear mouse living in my garage: i haven't seen you yet, which is good because i'd probably have a fit of hysterics.  but if you could please move yourself out of my garage, i'd probably not try to kill you anymore. just go away. (and please don't leave your family there either!) dear laundry: i'm sorry i've left so much of you dirty...but since i have to walk through the garage to wash you...it might be awhile.  dear maybelline: seriously, why is it that i fall in love with a delightful red nail polish of yours, and decide that's what i want my bridesmaids to wear for the wedding...and now it's nowhere to be found (including online at Target)?  dear vacation: i wish i could take one. ever.

linking up with:

{ps: didja enter this awesome giveaway yet?}

I be up in the gym...

Just workin' on my fitness.

{but really}

Ok, I have no gym.  Well, there is like a workout room where I work but after work it's always got boys in it...so I don't really want to use it.  Yet.  (although I'll be singin a different tune when it's cold out and I can't utilize the outdoors anymore).

So the day I decided to drop a few pounds (really, it's mostly because I cannot stand my boobs anymore.  I think they're starting to grow out of my bras again...I'm already a friggin' 38DDD. Yeah, TRIPLE D.  Epic, yes. Comfortable? No.) I found this website that's supposed to have the best and most supportive workout bras especially for well endowed ladies.  Apparently, well endowed only goes up to DD.  Which means, I have to lose boobs to fit into appropriate workout bras.

Seriously, who knew having epic boobs would create such problems?

{via}

Anyway.

I shared my newfound interest in slimming down a bit with my amazingly wonderful fiance.  You know what he said?  "Babe, I really think you're absolutely beautiful just the way you are.  But if you want to lose weight, I think you should do whatever you need to do." And I told him my hopes of dropping a cup size (or two) and that if losing weight doesn't help with that, I really want to get a breast reduction (which is the first time I've said that out loud by the way), and he said "As much as I'm a fan of your boobs, if you really want to get the surgery I totally support you, and I've told you before that since you complain about migraines and back pain so much it was worth looking into, to see if making them smaller would help with that."

Best. Fiance. EVER.

{Is it any wonder that I refused to wait for him to propose? I had to have him.}

So thus far on my "weight loss journey":

I haven't weighed myself.

I have taken several walks, without wearing my pedometer.

I have eaten yogurt, salad, fruit...

and a chicken finger wrap, as well as french fries, crescent rolls, and pierogies.

I am bad at this.

But!

My legs hurt today - a sure sign that walking is starting to work!

I haven't eaten after 7pm.

I have limited my snacks & avoided the vending machine at work entirely.

I have found a bunch of helpful information via Pintrest, as well as low fat recipes and the like.  I found a mini workout routine that you're supposed to do right when you wake up - and haven't managed to roll myself out of bed early enough for it since I found it Monday.  I may just do it after work today, as well as my walk.  That way I'm at least doing it, even if it's a different time!

You can follow my stuff on Pintrest {here}

{PS - Don't forget my giveaway!!}

More questions!

Linking up with {Gentri Lee} again :)

Ok, I don't really think this is that awkward, but it is silly, and it's from our engagement shoot so I had to use it <3

1. If you could be any princess- which would you be and why?
If we're talkin' Disney, probably Belle from Beauty & the Beast.  Because of that amazing library.

2. Do you have any odd habits? (do things in order, words that you say too often, etc)
I probably have a lot of them but...my fiance laughs at my need to keep the radio/tv volumes at even intervals.  So like, when the TV says the volume's at 11 instead of 10 or 12, it wigs me out. 

3. What's your "go to" outfit?
jeans and a tshirt of some sort.

4. Do you have any siblings? What are their genders, ages, order of age, names, etc?
I have 4. I'm the oldest.
Kelli - 24, Nanci - 22, Josh - 20, Hawk - 16

5. What's your favorite precious stone?
I really can't choose. I have come to love my birthstone though - Peridot.

6. If you had a check in your hand for 1 million dollars, what would you do with it?
pay off stuff I owe, buy another car (so we don't have to share anymore!), and hopefully put some into savings.

7. What do you love most about yourself- physically (eyes, smile, hair, etc. I don't know a good way to word that question...)
Eyes, hair, and smile.  Always my faves :)

{PS - Did you remember to enter my giveaway??}



319.

That is how many days remain until...

I get to marry my fiance.

Is it nuts that I get way more excited like everyday??  Seriously.  If my bed was the kind one could jump up and down upon...I'd be doing that right now.  He really is kind of ridiculously fantastical in every single way.  He makes my heart do little backflips, and keeps butterflies in my tummy.  The best?  When I told him last week that "I know I love you, but just for your information, I still have a huge crush on you."  He responded with "I feel that way too.  It's why I'm convinced marrying you is such a good idea."  Awwwh.  Amiright??

yeah, we're both wearing excessive amounts of makeup here.  yuppp...

{ps - did you remember to check out my giveaway? it ends on June 30th!!  make sure you enter asap!}

Oh, hello monday.

Today, I am sick.

Yes, again.

Some sort of stomach bug or I ate something weird yesterday...

{probably too many mozzarella sticks}

So at some point this weekend, I realized that I don't fit into my summer clothes anymore.

Like, any of them.

I fit into some of my dresses still (the really loose flowy ones), but shorts?  Tank tops?

Nope.

My cups have started to spilleth overeth.

{that's shakespearian for spilling over the top of everything i own}

via Pintrest, original {here}

I know I've posted here about being happy with myself, and good self esteem and all of that but...

Really, these are size XL clothes for crying out loud.  Size 13 pants?  Really?

I was an 8 in high school and thought *that* was fat.

I tried on one of my old (like high school old) dresses the other day, that was a size 8/10, and it barely fit over one thigh. My thighs are as big around right now as my waist used to be.

There's something seriously wrong with that picture.
And it's all my own doing.  Really, twelve mozzarella sticks at like 7 at night?  AND four peanut butter cookies?  Big ones?  Yeah, no bueno.

I know what stuff I'm supposed to be eating, and the exercise I'm supposed to be getting, but there's this little roadblock I know I keep hitting.  For some reason I just can't stop with the overeating and eating crap food.  I know it makes me feel shittier in the end but...it just feels like I have excuse after excuse to keep being that way.  And I hate myself for it.

So I guess what I'm saying is...
This ends today.
I will not put another piece of junk food in my mouth, until we cut the cake at my wedding.
{with the tiny exception of the tasting, because how on earth will I be able to not?}
This is going to piss me off royally.
No more pop tarts. Potato chips. Candy bars. Popcorn chicken. Ice cream snickers bars.  Chicken fingers in general.  Deep fried stuff period. No pop {soda for non - New Yorkers}, even ginger ale.  No boozey drinks.

I can do this.
One day at a time.
...

{ps - did you enter my giveaway? you should!!}

So tell me, what's your favorite healthy snacky alternative to chips and dip?  Or cupcakes?

The Best Weekend.

Ok, I'm exaggerating greatly.  I've had a migraine on and off since Thursday.

But.

Thursday night I actually took my {soon to be} step daughter to the beach, where we began a very pretty beach glass collection.  And Friday, I found a dress for my engagement pictures, and a shirt for my fiance to wear for them.  (And granted, I *had* already found a dress but...I totally changed my mind once I found the other one.  Ooops.)

& Saturday...was...the day...

Of our Engagement Pictures!!

Clearly I was (still am!) quite excited about them.

We have the BEST PHOTOGRAPHER EVER.

I am not exaggerating.

She is amazing, and anyone who dares to say otherwise will suffer my wrath. Such as it is.

{I did scare my fiance into jumping out of a moving vehicle...but that's a story for another day}

Anyway. I am so excited about the pictures, that I totally snagged some of them from her FB page.

Enjoy.

 

 

 All images are c/o Elizabeth Pellette

So, how was your weekend?

200!!

Two hundred sales on Etsy!!

You might remember that I decided I'd celebrate with a giveaway to commemorate this most auspicious occasion.  So...

What am I giving away, you may ask?

$25 shop credit to LolitaRose

Which means you get to choose what you like best and then own it and exclaim over its awesomeness and tell all your friends about it and make them come buy pretty, shiny things...

Or just get something for free.
Either way, score!

How to enter?

Leave a comment for EACH thing you do! (And make sure your email address is on there so I can contact you if you're the winner!)

Mandatory:

Follow my blog via GFC or Bloglovin'

& leave a comment on this post telling me what you'd spend your store credit on in my shop (+1)

Additional entries (leave a separate comment for each!):

"Like" LolitaRoseJewelry on Facebook (+2)

"Favorite" LolitaRose on Etsy (+2)

Tell me your favorite summer accessory (+2)

Purchase something from my Etsy or my online store (+10)

Winner will be chosen on June 30th via random number generator.

Ready...set...GO!

Friday Letters...

dear (future) step daughter: thanks for helping me start a beach glass/shell/pretty things from the beach collection yesterday.  and for not laughing when i got attacked by seaweed. dear migraine: two days? really? not cool.  dear heat wave: though quite ecstatic that you've managed to swoop in for the start of summer, could you try to calm it down at night?  just five degrees would help immensely. please. dear tomorrow: it is engagement picture day! please let my hair look perfect and my dresses look cute...and if you could help it to not rain or be too very hot, i'd love you foreverrrr.  dear fiance: 323 days. <3

Linking up with:

Seven Q's

Linking up with {GentriLee} for another round of Seven Questions!

it's halloween. i was a stepford wife. and from this picture, apparently also a pirate...



1. What do you do when you're sick? (Do you act like a baby? Tough it out? Have any weird cravings? Cry?)

i act like a two year old probably. and sometimes my fiance brings me chocolate.  and always ginger ale!  it fixes everything.

2. What do you do to find motivation when you feel you've lost it?

if i had an answer to this, my house would be clean right now and i'd have new pretties listed in my shop...but...summertime.  i have no motivation now.

3. Do you wish time away or do you savor every moment?

probably more of the wishing time away.  because i really hate being cooped up at work. which is usually where i am.  blearghhh.

4. If you could be any mythological creature, what would you be, and why?

a dragon. i don't know why, i just have always thought they were awesome.  but the english kind that are huge and dinosaur like, not the chinese kind that are long and lean.  those are creepy.

5. What is your current biggest weakness and are you working on fixing it?

shopping has always been my weakness, and every time i think i'm doing good at not spending so much money and such...i turn around and have a shopping spree because i have money.  i'm going to remove my debit card from my wallet after this weekend so i'll have no way to spend so much money...we'll see how it goes.

6. How do you greet someone when meeting them for the first time?

probably a shy smile and a weak handshake.  i don't like meeting people...i get all shy and nervous and little kid ish about it.  unless i've been drinking...then you probably get a ginormous hug that you wish i wouldn't give you! haha.

7. How do you grocery shop? (Do you write up a list? Go in with no idea what you're looking for? Have meal plans? Bring your own shopping bags?)

i am the worst grocery shopper.  i never go unless i'm hungry, i never have a list and always forget stuff, i never remember to bring any of the eight zillion reusable bags i own...yeah. i should work on that!

I love it when you call me Big Poppa...

This is a post for all the fathers I know.

For my daddy, and my wonderful grandfathers.

For my friends who have children.

For my uncles, and my brother in law (who is soon to have his first!)

And for my absolutely amazing fiance.  (yesterday, i was grudgingly {because i really am princessy} helping him rake up the grass clippings in the yard {ugh it was hot and such a stupid chore} and he said "I can't wait until Boo needs spending money so I can make her do this stuff for her allowance", to which i responded, "Yeah, like you'd make her do anything. She's got you wrapped around her finger."  His response? "Yeah you're right. I'm gonna be so screwed." Hahah i love him.)

Also, it is a little creepy to say daddy.

Like, "who's your daddy". 

Legit, kinda pervy.

Moving on.

my fiance and his daughter.  this was at pizza hut. and also, neither one of them looks like they're giving a real smile. dorks.

this is me and my dad at my sister's wedding.  the last really happy day any of us has really had.

Me and my grandpa Byron.  I love him. So much.

Um, and because I can't resist.

dear friday.

I just love this.

dear fiance: i hope you know how hard i'm crushing on you right now.  yes, i love you...but i still have the biggest crush on you.  i can't wait to spend my forever with you <3  dear eyelids: yes, i know you're struggling to stay open right now, but bear with me here.  only six hours til we can nap!  dear almond joy: stop being delicious so i can eat the yogurt i brought today.  good intentions and all.  jerkface. dear bank account: stop reminding me of how broke i am. not. cool.  dear work: today i hate you, because you totally ruined my date with my bed.  dear sandusky: jail is too good for you. i hope they fry your ass.

linking up to:

on other topics...
hi :)
so next weekend is our engagement photo session!  i am so beyond excited. i seriously cannot wait!!  our photographer(s) are amazing.  i can't wait to see what they do!

i know i said i wasn't going to post a picture of the dress i ordered until the photos...but... i love it so much.  so it is this one:

{ravenbombshell}

tell me it's not fabulous!  i cannot wait til it comes in..custom made just for me and everything! eek!

I forgot to feed my goldfish.

Probably for like two days now.

Good thing they're pretty sturdy little buggers.

{this is why i don't have a cat. or dog. or child.}

{my fishies do have names though!  odin. edmond. reginald redfish. zazz blamatazz. and ron burgundy.}

{mamaslittlebabies}

 Anyways.

This was one of the bestest (it's a word. legit.) weekends I've had the pleasure of having in a long time.  Yesterday was my little sister's baby shower (pictures later) and it was really pretty awesome.  I kind of planned most of it, so I am especially glad that everyone had so much fun and my sister got everything she could possibly need or want.  My little nephew is going to be one lucky little guy!  He's already loved by so many!  The craziness of the baby shower was followed by a really fun date night with my fiance.  He's just picked up a bunch more shifts at his work, so we've barely seen each other this past week.  Saturday night we were able to go someplace we've never gone before: the Ellicottville Brewing Company.  And of course, once I figure out exactly where my computer puts pictures I get from my SD card, I will be posting pictures of our delicious dinner.

Today was fun, since I got to visit an old friend who was kind enough to throw a party for my jewelry!  I got to meet her son for the first time (he's adorable. i wanna steal him haha.), and catch up and eat beer bread.  Perfection.  This was followed by a two second idea to go to the beach (the parking lot was sooo full I ended up leaving before parking even...i didn't wanna be a lone creeper at the packed beach!!), and I ended up at the bar my fiance works at.  Where I indulged in a delightful meal, including my favorite chicken finger wrap ever (jalapeno honey bbq sauce, heck yes.)  Oh, did I mention I got to spend the day driving around my dad's Lincoln Town Car??  Holy boatmobile Batman.  It's like five times the size of my Focus.  It was awesome.

In only two weeks, my fiance and I get to finally have our engagement photo session!!  I've been so excited for months, and have been looking for a pretty dress to wear since I booked the date.  Seriously, every single time I walk into a store (whether it's WalMart or a boutique!) I immediately end up in the dress section, looking for something cute.  Thus far, I've come up with nada.  Zilch, zip, nothing. Until today! I found this wonderful vintage inspired dress on Etsy, and the seller said she can have it here in time.  Custom made just for me!! I'm not posting a picture yet but...pink.  Heck. Yes.

Oh I hate violence, but oh, drugs are bad!

Friday night.

Watching Grandma's Boy.

{I am simultaneously a 15 year old boy, a 16 year old girl, and an 80 year old woman}

Today, in celebration of not winning a single giveaway like...ever, I decided to take myself shopping.

Um, and also get stuff for my sister's baby shower I forgot about before (big shocker - I still forgot some stuff).

So, I went to Target (that's tar-jay if you're fancy) because it's probably my favoritest store in the whole world (totally a word, look it up) (oh you did?  well, you must not have the new fangled dictionary. just roll with it. mmkay?) because I wanted to look for a dress for our upcoming engagement photos.  Needless to say, I didn't get a dress, but still ended up spending close to a cool Benjamin there.  On what you may ask?  Well, this stuff here:

{neon hoodie}

A bright hoodie. Because all but one of my other hoodies have been relegated to being "work" hoodies (meaning they smell like coolant and probably have grease/dust/dirt stains), and this has been taunting me for like a month.  Love.

{the strange case of halestorm}

New Halestorm CD.  True story - I had no idea who this band was til like a week ago.  Then I heard this song on the radio and was in LOVE with this woman's voice.  Hardcore. Like whoa.

And I got some bandaids (due to the foot trauma of this morning...), some allergy meds (for my poor fiance), and the latest Julia Quinn novel (because if I'm not reading the Walking Dead comic books, I'm usually reading historical romance novels...hence the 80 year old woman).

And then I went to WalMart (because ya know, it's not a full day if you don't go to WalMart), for the baby shower stuff I forgot at Target, and ended up with this:

{maybelline color show nail lacquer}

Um, only not purple (though my favorite color, my life is shockingly lacking purple).  I got it in "Keep up the Flame" and "Orange Fix".  LOVE.  I got "Born With It" last week, and loved it so much I needed other colors.  I am in the midst of a bit of a nail polish obsession lately.  {speaking of which, why is it that i decide to do my nails and then immediately think of eight zillion things i need to do, ensuring that at least one (but probably all) of my nails end up messed up because i won't wait for them to dry??}  I think I need to buy "Keep up the Flame" to give to all my bridesmaids, because it's a really awesome red.  Loving it.

You see now how important things I actually need are forgotten about.  I'm like a raccoon.  Easily distracted by pretty or sparkly or shiny things.  And glitter.  I really need to buy some glittered nail polishes soon.  They have really nifty colors right now.

OH!  And I'm still one sale away from 200 in my {Etsy} shop.  Someone help a sistah out, would ya?  I'll throw in something suppperrrrrr special.  Seriously.

Dear...

dear friday: can you be over now? so far, you're not being nice to me. how dare you cause me to impale my foot first thing this morning?  i don't care what you say, it wasn't my fault the piece of jewelry wire was on the carpeted floor... dear super amazing IT guy: thank you for setting up my new laptop and not laughing at me when i couldn't connect to the internet because i didn't turn the wi fi button on.  you rock. i definitely owe you.  dear mom: i hope you know how much i love and appreciate you, not just because you drive me around when i don't have my car or buy me cool tech devices.  dear hair: stop being unruly!!!  dear potato chips: seriously, stop leaping out of your back and into my mouth! i've told you, we can't see each other anymore.  dear sunday: please be awesome and let me earn a lot of money.  momma's broker than the oldest joke.  dear pomegranate and cranberry green tea: thank you for being utterly delicious.  dear fiance: i miss you. hangout saturday night?  xoxo

On a not Friday Letter kind of note...

Remember the Live Healthy Challenge?  Well the last two weeks have been all about healthy eating habits, and let me tell you, I have been failing miserably.  I start out every morning with the best of intentions - eat some yogurt and such.  (Yup, still choking it down.  I'm starting to kind of like the cherry kind even.)  But somehow I keep breaking down and buying chips or a candy bar or making something baked and not healthy once I get home (unless I eat a dinner of chips or something).  Yesterday I even purposely bought myself healthy (healthier) snacks for work: OatFit oatmeal (100 calories each package - super yummy too!), Special K bars (100 cals), Nature Valley granola thins (80 cals)...and walked to Subway for lunch (1/2 turkey sub, no dressing, on honey oat roll)...and still ended up eating an Almond Joy and chips.  UGH.  I don't know why I just can't seem to re-train myself to stay on the right track.

I'm not super concerned with my weight or anything like that.  I'm pretty happy with myself, and so is my fiance, but I just know that I'm not as healthy as I can and should be.  So I've been trying to push myself to eat better and get more (or some, because generally I get none) exercise. 

 But it's been a really hard road just trying to re-train myself.  Yesterday I bought ingredients for berry smoothies, (frozen berries, yogurt, juice) so I'm hoping that having one of those for breakfast and a healthier lunch will help to keep me on the right track!  And it has been a couple weeks since I've had soda! (Um except one small malibu & coke...forgive me, it was so yummy. and it was only one!)

So I'll be posting more in the next few weeks about how I've "tricked" myself into eating healthier and doing more exercise.  I haven't lost any weight, but my migraines have been pretty much nonexistant since I changed up most of my worst eating habits!  What are some of your favorite ways to stay healthy?

P.S. I've decided on this as my signature, because that's actually how I write my name in real life :)  T that looks like a 7 and all. 

Happiness is...

...being surrounded by your (many) siblings, the only people on Earth who can verify that all the stories you tell about your parents being crazy are true.

...your hometown.  Sure, you complain every day about how badly you want to leave, but then you wouldn't run into all of your old high school friends at WalMart, now would you?

...bare feet on your porch on an unseasonably warm day.  Come on, summer time.

...a really cute outfit, just for lounging around the house.

...watching your incredibly talented friends perform in what used to be a church.

...getting to marry your very best friend.  <3